I’m no expert on love and I don’t claim to be but, it’s a whole lot easier to show up for someone when you’re whole. There’s a million phrases like “fill your cup first” that reflect this idea.
I can’t say for sure where it started. Maybe from my amazing mom when she hung a wooden plaque in my room next to a mirror that read:
“I am the only unique me that will ever be. I have the power to make a difference in this world. I look forward to taking on the grand adventure of life, living and always remembering to be myself. I love being me!”
I can’t recall who wrote it, but I remember those words to this day. Maybe I draw it from constantly moving as a kid. Being “the new kid” every other year comes with some self reflection work. Introducing myself to the other students and figuring out where I might fit in takes some self awareness early on.
Maybe it’s from the wisdom that comes from the law of attraction that the more you put yourself in places doing things that make you happy and that bring you joy and fulfillment you’ll find others who enjoy those things too. Volleyball was our mutual activity.
I’d be lying if I didn’t think outright gratitude is something else we wouldn’t be able to make it without. I am grateful that he gives me the space to make time for the things that make me feel full of life. I can say no to washing the dishes right now. I can say no. He can say no. There’s still a balance where we say yes a lot, but man it feels so good. Now, I know I could always express it more, but I am so grateful when I get to exercise saying no and not feel shameful or like I’m going to get a guilt trip because I didn’t want to do something. I am grateful that we are able to bring the issues that bother us or when we want to try something new, just bring it to the table and we respect each other enough to let those ideas fly and I adore you for it. Our relationship is something I truly value and I look forward to the future evolutions of it. Thanks for trusting me with being yourself and allowing me to be myself.